Stalking: What you should know

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Are you in, or have you recently left, a dating delationship in which your partner...

• Called you or emailed messages that threatened or annoyed you
• Showed up uninvited at your home, classes, or place of work
• Looked through your mail, computer files and personal effects
• Tried to get personal information about you from others
• Threatened to harm you or those close to you (incl. pets)
• Threatened or vanadalized personal belongings (incl. your car)
• Entered your home when you weren't there

What you may think are "relationship issues" may be elements of what is known as "stalking" or "criminal harassment". Each small incident may not seem that serious, but if you are in any way feeling fearful of your partner, you should seek assistance even just to talk about what is going on.

If you have left the relationship, such behavious can escalate during the first few months after leaving, or on dates/anniversaries to which your partner gave special importance.

Don't ignore:

• Your own gut feelings, doubts, anxiety, discomfort and fear.
• A sense of loss of control over your life (e.g. feeling the need to change everyday activities, such as skipping classes or work, to avoid the person)
• Poor academic performance
• Poor concentration, depression and difficulty sleeping

Trust your feelings: It is important for you to be safe, to know that you have options and to feel as if you have control over your life and life choices.

For advice and confidential assistance, you may contact:

• Queen's Human Rights Office at 613 533 6886 or hrights@post.queensu.ca
• Campus Security at 613 533 6080 or campus.security@queensu.ca
• Health, counselling and disability services at 613 533 2506

Fear should never be part of a loving and healthy relationship.